Post One.

I used to blog a bit — never consistently, but it has always been something I wanted to do more of. There are a number of drafts I’ve started on Medium, Wordpress, and in the notes on my phone. These drafts aren’t necessarily blog posts, as that is something more formed than these drafts were, so I never posted as they felt too incomplete. For some reason the idea of maintaining an active blog has been a bit daunting, as I’ve felt the posts needed to be complete and perfectly written posts with a more standard word count (what is it now? 300-ish words?). But I’ve been learning lately, that when I re-frame and re-phrase things for myself, it can make things feel more comfortable and accessible. :) So, for some reason the idea of posting “Musings” instead of blog posts feels more manageable.

Words are funny things.

I find if I let too much time go by where I don’t jot something down in a notebook, journal, or in those notes I mentioned on my phone, it gets bottled up, clogged up, and if I wait too long, the words almost seem to get “moldy.” Sometimes the moldiness becomes interesting - like the thought or reflection grows new unexpected forms from sitting for so long. But often, it feels more like I want to clean the mold off and get back to what was underneath, when it was fresh.

When mold becomes gorgeous - Photo by Alex Gruber

There are so many amazing writers in my little world - my sister-in-law Rachel, my good friend Adele, my colleague and friend Nancy. They all write so well, I’m captivated by their artful prose. It’s inspiring and also intimidating to be surrounded by so many fabulous words coming from such fabulous people. But again, I’m realizing I don’t have to write like them, in order to write. I can write my own messy musings, even if it’s sometimes only for the sake of clearing the clutter in my mind so I can move onto the next thought. Dusting off those words and helping them find their place.

We watched “The Electrical Life of Louis Wain” last night in our hotel room, and I was inspired by some of Louis’ story. What a hard life he lead - full of loss, pain, hard work, mental illness. But his imagination was bright, his artistic abilities impressive, and his capacity to love was deep (when he felt safe). I won’t give the whole story away, but his love Emily says that he’s like a prism - he is naturally gifted at reflecting the beauty that already exists in the world, and multiplying it.

I feel there’s a sliver of this inside of me, and inside of everyone I meet.

We’re meant to be prisms illuminating the things that we’re passionate about and reflect our way of seeing back to the world…. and connecting with others because of it.

My husband James does it whenever he delightfully shares about a new species of reptile he finds on a trail. Our friend Esther lit up over tacos the other night when she was discussing orange trees & botany. Our nephew Ashrey talks about Star Wars, and his energy level goes from about 93 to 147. My best friend Becky (who’s an esthetician) speaks in a different tone when she’s sharing about a new facial oil she’s discovered…it’s totes adorbs! ;)

So, for anyone reading this… know that I’m not an excellent writer, I’m not even great. And I’m not trying to be self deprecating, I’m just trying to be honest. Trying to set expectations (and bars) low, for your sake, and for mine. I love reading anything from friends and family, and when I read their writing, I feel invited into their inner world in beautiful ways, even if they wouldn’t consider themselves a “writer.” I also feel inspired to share more of my inner world. I hope my unedited musings find their way to the right eyes and minds in a similar way, and that the words might reflect something beautiful, even a sliver, in a new light, and inspire even more sharing from others.

Visual communication comes so much more naturally to me than writing - using photography, my love of art and design, helping folks with branding and content projects. But I have been trying to stretch the muscles of my written and verbal communication recently, working on being more articulate and expressive with my words. I also turned 36 this week, and for my next year around the sun I’m going to post a Musing, once a week. It might be just one word, one line, or a more long form reflection. There is a quote by Maya Angelou (below) that was at first intimidating, then welcoming, and now has morphed into a cornerstone of my creative work & career. It has proven to be true in other creative forms, and I now trust the process and trust it will be true in this instance as well…that I won’t run out of ideas or things to write for the next 52 weeks….

"You Can't Use Up Creativity, the More You Use the More You Have" - Maya Angelou

Cheers, to new goals, more sharing, less self -criticism & comparison, and keeping all of those poor words from getting moldy.

And, cheers to Post One of manageable Musings. 🥂

P.S.

I’ll post a snap of where I’m posting my Musings from, though it won’t always (or should I say often?) be this glamorous.

(Post cover photo by Florian Klauer)